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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29247174">nookie (ridonculous)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Megadeth, Ridiculousness (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blow Jobs, Come Eating, Face-Fucking, M/M, Nepotism, dave is turned on by that for some reason, dave sucks dick for a job, dc hat mention, kinda idk, more succy succy less fuccy fuccy, no edits we die like men, robs a douche</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 11:08:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>958</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29247174</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>dave wants to be on ridiculousness. like, really bad.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rob Dyrdek/Dave Mustaine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>nookie (ridonculous)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>greetings to u, children of the world. i saw the <a href="https://images.app.goo.gl/Q1jHnr54r3ZMbtUZA"> mtv schedule for last week</a> and had a heart attack so i wrote another dave x weird man with no correlation to megadeth fic. mtv is to blame</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Wait, do you promise?”</p>
<p>“Promise what?” Rob asks, taking his belt out of its loops.</p>
<p>Dave fumbles with Rob’s baggy jeans, pulling them down his thighs before doing the same with his briefs.</p>
<p>“That you’ll let me be a guest on Ridiculousness after this.”</p>
<p>“<em>Oh!</em> Yeah, sure. Whatever you want, baby,” Rob purrs. He helps Dave out with his underwear, pulling them down himself until his cock, hot and hard, falls out. </p>
<p>A rough hand grabs a fistful of Dave’s hair and eases him onto his knees, ready to take him in. “Now suck my dick.”</p>
<p>Dave flashes Rob a mischievous smirk as he tucks long ginger locks behind his ears. “Yes, <em>daddy</em>."</p>
<p>Dave’s slender fingers wrap around the cock mere inches from his face. He gives it a long, slow stroke, testing the waters. It gets a nice throaty moan out of Rob, his hips bucking forwards towards his mouth.</p>
<p>“<em>Fuck</em>, baby. Just blow me already, c’mon.”</p>
<p>“Is the door locked?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, and everyone left two hours ago. The whole building’s empty, baby. I don’t think anyone will be seeing you ‘n’ me together ‘til your episode comes out.”</p>
<p>It’s enough reassurance to get Dave to lick a thin stripe from the base of Rob’s cock to the very tip. Above him, Rob hisses through his teeth and leans back on his desk, eyes rolled back in pure bliss. </p>
<p>His tongue teases around the head, dips into the slit. The salty and bitter taste of precum spreads across his mouth, and Dave can’t help but shiver at how much it riles him up. A few more long strokes, and then he wraps his lips around the tip of Rob’s cock, giving some teasingly gentle sucks.</p>
<p>Rob’s knees buckle under him and he braces himself against his desk, knuckles going white as he holds on to the edge. His pants are hot and heavy in the tiny office, and Dave can’t get enough of how much he’s making the host squirm. </p>
<p>The ginger sucks in a breath through his nose before taking him all in in one swift bob of his head. </p>
<p>“<em>Fuck!</em>” Rob groans, “That’s right, that’s how I fuckin’ like it.”</p>
<p>Dave keeps bobbing his head, Rob keeps egging him on with sweet words and hands in his hair pushing his head back down. Rob catches a glimpse of those painfully hazel eyes looking up at him, and he almost cums at how beautiful Dave looks. On his knees, taking a thick cock in his mouth, tight shirt and skinny jeans showing off all of his lovely little curves of muscle. </p>
<p><em>Fuck</em>, he’s so hot. And then Dave pulls off, the cold air sending a chill up Rob’s body.</p>
<p>“Y’want to fuck my face?” Dave asks, a hint of would-be innocence in his eyes.</p>
<p>“<em>Fuck yeah</em>,” he whispers back. “I should probably take this off, then.”</p>
<p>“Wait.” Dave stops Rob in his tracks, his hand thankfully only half way to his head. “Leave the DC hat on, I- I kinda like it.”</p>
<p>Rob huffs out a quiet laugh and strokes Dave’s cheek. It’s gentle, deceivingly so. Dave almost forgets that Rob’s hands are both on him again and guiding him back down to his cock.</p>
<p>A hard thrust with his hands firmly planted on Dave’s head, and he’s hammering away at the sweet ginger’s throat. Dave gags for a split second, but he breathes in through his nose and keeps taking Rob’s dick in deep. Rob pants as he fucks his face, his hips and hands working together to make use of his warm and wet hole.</p>
<p>Dave whines and groans. Everything is choked back and wet-sounding; his little moans are muffled, the dull vibrations in his throat going straight to Rob’s cock. His hands grab at Rob’s thighs, urging him to keep going. </p>
<p>He had his eyes closed before, but Dave cracks them open at last. Some tears well up, but he blinks them away. Rob looks so hot pumping away, biting his lip and whispering “<em>fuck</em>" as he goes. The brim of his cap is slowly sliding over his eyes, but something in Dave loves the douchiness it exudes.</p>
<p>Dave’s eyes wander around the office for a second. There’s not much to see; most of it is just blank beige wall after blank beige wall, a single large cabinet breaking the monotony. It astonishes him how little Rob decorated his own place. But then he sees it. The giant Ridiculousness season 3 poster on the wall. It’s the only splash of color in the drab office, and Dave remembers why he’s doing it all. Why he’s on his knees sucking dick, why he’s letting Rob Dyrdek of all people fuck his mouth. It’s not just for the nookie; it’s for the fans.</p>
<p>He pats at Rob’s thigh until he pulls out, coughing and taking a deep breath. </p>
<p>“I want you to cum on my face,” Dave rasps.</p>
<p>Rob doesn’t answer back, instead taking his dick in his hand and jerking off furiously. Dave holds his mouth open, and it’s with a shuddery groan that Rob cums, his warm seed splashing on him in thick pumps. He catches some of it in his mouth, some in his hair, most of it across his face. </p>
<p>Rob lets out a final moan and looks back down on Dave. The ginger’s face is covered in his cum, with one long streak touching his hair. Dave licks some off his lip, a sweet smile on his face.</p>
<p>“You taste fuckin’ good, Rob.”</p>
<p>“Your mouth is <em>so</em> amazing,” he pants.</p>
<p>Dave wipes some cum with his thumb and licks it off. “Weird question, but will I get my own DC cap and red Reeboks for the show?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, sure, whatever.”</p>
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